1/6 - Taking the pressure off to just learn

Woke up super early today and after dropping mom off went to a coffee shop to work, got matcha instead of coffee. I think I really just need to discontinue coffee from my life because the anxiety it gives me is just too much.

lolol while I was at the coffee shop, I booked all my dental, vision, health appointments to get them out of the way just in case I do need to quit. Just want to be prepared lol. I know part of me is like I really am showing up like I’m going to quit, but I think I’m treating this like I treated staying in Chicago or my apartment. I’m just doing what I need to do to detach. I feel at peace that way. For my apartment and Chicago, I feel detached now. I’ve already gone through the emotions of potentially moving that now I’m just acting like nothing happened and focusing on other things. Same with my job, need to get all the fears out of the way and the health check-ups lol, so I’m prepared. For the past couple of days, I’ve been feeling at peace about it and have just accepted it as whatever happens happens. I’ll know when I need to make the decision.

Anyways, today was my first day showing up as corporate girly and a content creator. Tbh I was so close to just being like ahhh today was a hard work day, I don’t have time to make anything for Tiktok, but then I was like no. We’re doing it. We’re posting something, anything. And I literally ended up making a voiceover video within an hour. I needed to prove to the universe I could do both, and show up as that.

For content - I’m just posting whatever now. Initially I was like what if I let my niche become something else, that I’m not proud of? But no. This is what I want to be known for. This is what makes sense for me in my ecosystem, especially with my blog. I want to be a speaker, and this is what I want to speak about. This is what I feel like I was self learning about. And this is what I’m passionate about now, and have been all my life. Healing and law of attraction just feels like my calling. And now that I think about it, I’ve always been like that. All my life, i’ve always taught people about the positives and just healing tips. That’s how I got my mom out of depression. My friends out of depression. Helped friends from breakups. Helped myself out of a breakup. Helped friends get better in their dating journey. And the fact I work in an area that people break-up all the time. It’s like I see the damage live and no that so many people need this advice. Especially, south asian women. Maybe that’s the thing I’m missing in my content. Appealing to south asian women. That was the first intention behind this blog anyways.

And I know I can do it, because literally I just worked with a dating coach for Dil Mil stuff, and I think I give better advice. So I know I’ve done my work to learn, and do not feel underqualified at all.

There is a crowd that I will attract. I just haven’t found it yet. And I’m not giving up.

Anyways, now that I’m like I’m just posting to learn on my own Tiktok, maybe I’ll create a new Tiktok and start fresh for the healing content.

To take the pressure off my channels, lol I’m thinking of adopting even more hobbies. Basically ignoring all my actual problems, so I don’t hyperfocus on it and continue to let the universe do what it needs to do, while I work on becoming a better version of myself.

8/10 - Sometimes, I have waves of doubt. But I believe in myself. I can do anything. I’ve always been like that.

Intuition - My brand does need to be about healing content. It just feels like my purpose right now, so the ultimate goal will lead to that.