10/5 - a good nervous

I’m sitting at Bryant Park with a cup of coffee while I’m waiting for my hotel room and I feel oddly at peace. It has a place in my heart. It’s the place I did my first outdoor photoshoot, so I got to see it as a place of love. It’s caustic but it has beauty to it. I think all of New York is like that. It’s crazy to think I really left it to god and the universe to see if I was going to go to New York. And I’m actually here. The universe did end up bringing me here. And although this place is super familiar to me, it feels slightly different. This time I’m here for me. It’s slightly scary but freeing to know I can do whatever I want on my term.

And somewhere I feel like god wanted me to stay connected to New York. He brought me by myself to a place where I feel safe and comfortable for my first solo trip? Sometimes, I lose sight of how I used to do this in SF every weekend when I moved back. I need to remember that literally I’ve done everything. It’s good to have fear but literally I’ve done it all. And I am sooooo ready.