10/30 - Staying true to myself and learning how to not overcompensate

I’m recently learning that when I feel like someone can get me something, I almost become a slight people pleaser and overcompensate. It almost gives “chasing” energy because I’m slightly changing who I am to get them to like me.

But that’s where I think I’m messing up.

I need to remember that no matter who it is I need to stay true to my energy and stay emotionally regulated because like what I learned a couple of weeks ago people will gravitate towards you when you’re authentic not sugar-coated nice.

The backstory to this:

There’s this girl that I hired recently and she’s been doing cool things and Hasan Minhaj even invited her to interview him. She also is friends with the people I want to be friends with and know in NY. Literally she’s my gateway right now to next lifestyle I want.

But the content she has been creating is shit. So for personal reasons, I was even like should I just sugar-coat it to her to stay on her good side or should I just keep her on for a bit to reek personal benefits or just be friends with her personally.

But no because that’s changing who I am, people pleasing and literally chasing energy just because I think she can get me what I want.

And I’ve noticed I do this in relationships too. That’s where the overcompensating comes from. When I think a guy can get me the next lifestyle I want. And what do I learn from it? They don’t get me shit. Literally I end up getting MYSELF the same exact things by myself.

So even for this girl. I’m just going to be straight up with her but how I feel, and if she doesn’t work out she doesn’t work out. I’m not going to play favorites or be nice to her just because she can be a stepping stone. Because I’m sure the universe is testing me.

If it’s meant for me, it will come to me no matter what just the way I am. I don’t need to kiss someone’s ass to do it.

9/10 - Rating depends on the pals dinner