3/12 - sick

I started feeling a bit sniffly last night and woke up just completely congested. I don’t think I’ve been sick like this for a while. Thankful there’s no coughs, just a really stuffy nose, so it’s a bit hard to breathe. 

Today, god really showed me I made the right decision with “arrange” guy. Just his lifestyle is nowhere near mine and my mom said me that his parents have just been asking around everywhere. To think I felt sooo guilty and had to say no. Literally I needed this to happen. I’ve always just given people changes because I’ve always believed in the “what if” when my gut has always none the answer from day 1. 

Something else that’s just been getting to me is just doomscrolling. I need to stop it’s draining me and I’m completely overstimulating myself. 

On the other note, I also realized that if I want to get promoted I need to apply the same true and show up like I already got promoted. I’m already working like it, but I have this “bitterness” to me like I’m super pissed off, which is probably repealing it because if I was actually promoted I would be satisfied.

I’m honestly showing up as someone that’s about to quit, which I just have to decide what I want more. To quit or to get my pay raise.

4/10 - Sick and stuffy

Intuition - Carrying all this “bitterness” isn’t doing anything for me right now