9/27 - accepting being single

The morning started off being rough. I felt overwhelmed Still contemplating on my breakup with J. I just feel like I’m still not over with my feelings for it. I may still feel shame. I may still feel guilt. I may still feel anxiety. I may still feel scared to ever have this happen to me again.

I think I need to actually take the time tomorrow to address all the feelings that I’m running away from.

I did go to Garba with my friends later and now that my friends also know I think I’m finally accepting being single now that I’ve told all my friends. It no longer feels like I’m hiding it.

I think I’m starting to like the possibility that my person could literally be perfect. And I no longer have to just accept J’s flaws for the rest of my life.

My person could actually be my person. And I wouldn’t just be compromising for a vision I have. The future seems hopeful and limitless. Right now, it truly feels like god has a better plan for me. A plan that includes MY PERSON.