1/17 - My niece
A lot of stuff is happening next week with the immigration stuff, and it’s going to be in the negatives, so this weekend is really about just getting errands down, so I can hibernate at home next week and focus on my routine. Basically went to do some returns, and did my hair care routine. I’m trying to find ways to make it softer.
Anyways, I’m going to see my childhood best friend’s daughter today! Her name is Siyara and she was born early December. Basically, I’m her aunt and honestly this feels like the closest thing to having an actual niece. We were the first people to know when she was born, so it just feels special.
We went to her house and literally I started crying holding Siyara. Not going to lie, I haven’t held a baby in a while so lolol felt like I was holding a dog. Unfiltered thoughts but remembered she was my neice. Went upstairs and was talking to my sister and literally it just felt so special it felt like I needed to protect Siyara from against the world and I didn’t want anything bad happening to her. Having no siblings this moment honestly felt insane. I didn’t think I could ever feel this but I finally get why aunts love their nieces so much. All I wanted to do was buy her stuff and spoil her, because I love her so much already. Her little fingers and everything.
My best friend also cooked for us so it was nice tasting her food for the first time. And then my mom showed her how to massage her and stuff since my mom is a newborn nanny. lolol I was getting scared at the way she was holding Siyara at times but it’s just because she’s comfortable. I can’t wait for the day my mom gets to take care of my kids too. I just know it’ll be such a special moment.
I know that a lot of my greatest blessings are yet to come and I just can’t wait.
Also Tiktok got banned today. It happened earlier than expected. I thought it was going to go dark at 12am but everyone just started getting messages at 8pm and with me just being busy today, I didn’t even see what was happening in the last few minutes. But whatever, it is what it is. We’ll see what happens next.
10/10 - Seeing Siyara just made my heart explode with love and just removed so much negative energy. I’m convinced babies are 1231230+ positive electrons.
Intuition - I’m literally going to be there for Siyara and I just want God to always protect her.
